If I had to choose between bacon and coffee, I’d slap the person making me choose.

I always say “No” to temptation — but it doesn’t always listen.

Who was the genius who decided to put fire hydrants by all the good parking spots?

Why is “Sean” pronounced “Shawn” instead of  “Seen” but “Dean” is pronounced “Deen” instead of “Dawn.”

I’ve found that if you tuck one part of your pant leg into your sock, people expect less of you.