Told the doctor I thought I had athlete’s foot. He looked at me and said, “I don’t think you have athlete’s anything.”

You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

In filling out an application, where it says, ‘In case of emergency, Notify:’ I put ‘DOCTOR.’

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.